About Cyrine Allani Joaristi

"I have nothing to wear", how many times have you uttered this words in dismay in front of your closet full of clothes and accessories? Well, that's the plague every woman is facing wether she is a fashionista or not. nothing-to-wear.com will address this major wardrobe disfunction by allowing you to access a carefully curated selection of preloved and vintage fashion gems. You will be able to choose outfits and accessories from luxury brands ranging from Chanel, Yves Saint Laurent, Christian Dior, to name a few. Just browse our collections, select a delivery and pick up time. Your rental items will come to you dry cleaned and delivered by a suited messenger. Once you had worn them, they will be picked up , hassle free. If you want to monetise your unused preloved items without loosing ownership, you call up one of our stylist for a closet decluttering. This concierge service will allow you to consign your pieces with us, provided that they are in pristine condition, and we will take care of everything for you. You can rent designer and vintage items for 15% of their retail price, and choose from a wide variety of style and sizes. Own the moment, not the dress. Access a lifestyle, don't only possess a dress

Muchachas de Katherine Pancol. Mucho blabla

La première trilogie a convolé en tête des ventes d’amazon pendant des mois. C’est vrai que j’ai adoré “Les yeux jaunes des crocodiles” et “La valse lente des tortues”. “Les écureuils de Central Park”, par contre, traînaient en longueur et je n’en pouvais plus des tergiversations entre Hortense et Gary, Joséphine et Philippe, Shirley et son prof de piano. Une sorte de je-t’aime-moi-non-plus laborieux et poussif. Mais cela se passait à New York, à l’époque où j’y vivais, et je me réjouissais d’un livre en français retraçant des endroits de mon quotidien.

Puis, amazon nous annonça, à grand renfort de marketing, d’emails et de vidéos promotionnelles que Katherine Pancol sortaient une nouvelles trilogie, “Muchachas”. Habitant cette fois au Mexique, je trouvais trop drôle que l’auteur nous relate, en trois gros pavés, la vie des femmes de ménage mexicaines. Bizarre, en effet me direz-vous… “Muchachas” ne parle bien évidemment pas des tribulations d’employées de maison mexicaines mais se trouve être la suite, extrêmement fastidieuse de la première série. Une histoire en 6 volumes, c’est une sexologie??? J’en doute, cela flairerait trop le 50 Shades mais la première, ou le premier s’il y a des messieurs qui me lisent, qui trouve le bon terme me l’envoie, svp.

UnknownBref, trève de digressions. La loi qui veut que les “suites de…” au ciné soient généralement de gros navets est également valable en littérature. A mon sens, il vaut mieux réduire la voilure, condenser l’intrigue et ne pas diluer la sauce ad libitum. Franchement, qui a aimé les 6ème et 7ème volumes de Harry Potter?

Dans “Muchachas 1”, il est question d’une grande blonde masculine et féline à la fois qui parle aux étoiles et a un fils d’un homme qui est obligé de se cacher. Joséphine et Shirley seraient-elles apparentées et auraient-elles découvert le chainon manquant? Que nenni, mais il faudra attendre le 3ème opus pour comprendre le lien.

Dans “Muchachas 2” qui se passe encore à NYC, de nombreuses erreurs se sont glissées. Hortense n’a pas de longues mèches blondes mais auburn et n’a pas fait ses classes chez GAP mais chez Banana Republic. J’eu pensé qu’Albin Michel aurait les moyens de se procurer des éditeurs et relecteurs dignes de ce nom. Je ne sais pas pour vous, mais moi, ces petits détails ont le don de m’agacer. Tout comme les scènes non raccord au cinéma d’ailleurs.

Bref, j’avais précommandé le troisième volet. Il m’attend chez mes parents mais je ne vais pas sauter dessus dès mon arrivée à Paris. Et j’ose espérer que cet opus sera le dernier de ma sextologie? Sexologie? (toujours besoin de votre aide ici) car il serait de bon ton que Madame Pancol close le sujet. Nous sommes très, très loin du niveau de l’une de ses premières oeuvres, “Une si belle image”.

Comme quoi, le marketing fait vendre.

PS, si vous ne savez pas quoi faire des navets qui encombrent votre bibliothèque, voici un très joli hérisson réaliser par mon fils Aidan que je trouve, perso, beaucoup plus réussi que l’oeuvre originale.

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g a young mother in the name of god

Today, Meriam Yahia Ibrahim Ishag has been sentenced to death by Khartoum judges. This pregnant 27 year old mother of a 20 months old baby has been found guilty of apostasy, the public and willing giving up of one’s religion.

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“We gave you three days to renounce your faith but you insisted on not coming back to Islam.” said the judge who condemned her to a hundred lashes for adultery (her husband being catholic) and death by hanging.

Amnesty International condemned the sentence and asked for her immediate liberation, in vain. Last Tuesday, the U.S, Canadian, British and Deutsch embassies told their fear for this young woman’s life, asking the Soudan government to respect freedom of religion and the right to change religion or believes. This right may have been written in the Sudanese constitution, in any Islamic Republic, the father transmits his religion, wether he has been present in the life of his children or not. Changing religion is pointless. Your father is muslim, you will be born, live and die a muslim, no matter what.

Meriam got married to a southern Sudan catholic. Being herself matter of factly muslim by birth even if she was raised in the catholic faith, her marriage isn’t valid for muslim laws and Sudan government. Her children are to be born under X or unknown father. It would have been the same in any other Islamic Republic or country were Islam is the government of state. Hence the accusation of adultery and the 100 lashes.

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While being sentenced, Meriem Yahia Ibrahim Ishag stood still calmly stating that she  never committed apostasy which is true since she has been raised in the catholic faith and never renounced it. This is without knowing that islamic law… The husband has to be muslim. If he is not, then he can convert in front of an Imam and the process is a lot simpler than for a woman to convert into judaism.

The only thing I do not understand is where is the husband? Or father of her children? I assume he is catholic too.  So why nobody thought about getting him in front of an Imam in order to save his wife and children’s life? Why doesn’t he step up and stand in front of these barbarian Khartoum judges to convert to Islam? That is the ONLY solution to preserve his wife and baby to be’s life, Meriam is 8 months old pregnant and I highly doubt the baby, nor her,  in the womb would resist the 100 lashes.

WHERE IS MERIEM’S HUSBAND? And where is the French government too because I heard him give its opinion on several matters, more or less relevant but when’re does it stand in this case?

The world has definitively gone mad and criminals are prosecuting their crimes in total impunity, hiding themselves behind God’s will. Or so they say. Whose god would ask for the life of an 8 month pregnant mother because she married in the wrong faith? My thoughts go to Meriem, her son and her baby and I really hope for a miracle. To many women have already paid for men madness.

 

Tiger Mom or Cougar Town?

Yes, one could wonder while seeing this pic. Don’t worry, I was just standing in the rain, watching my kids playing tennis, like every afternoon. Rain or shine…

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But while the majority of “soccer moms ” will support their kids is sweat pants, leave it to the french to wear something a little more glam’. Here I chose a Zara Classic day dress in leopard print which will give me the opportunity to tell you a little more about leopard in fashion.

Cavemen use to wear leopard furs to protect them from the cold but also to gain strength and courage from the animal spirit. In 2565 AD, the Egyptian princess Néfertiabet was buried in an asymmetrical leopard sheath, a symbol of power and hommage to Bastet , protective goddess  of mothers and children but also to Sekhmet, goddess of destructives forces. These two feline divinities evoked  both woman creative and destructive powers.

In 1925, the american actress Marian Nixon creates a buzz while trotting down Hollywood Boulevard with a leopard on leash, living version of her fur coat.

ImageIn the U.S, leopard print was the staples of starlets and always had a tacky version. The first Grand Couturier to use leaper print not only fir and turn it into a beacon of elegance was Monsieur Christian Dior with the launch of his Couture house in 1947. Yes, leopard prints were part of the new look and it was  an instant hit within the clients. Below here is the “Afrique” evening dress and her little sister “Jungle” afternoon dress from the SS1947 collection both of which I would gladly wear today.

Christain-Dior-Leopard-print-dress-1947Dior 1947

This August 29th 1953 leopard print bustier gown covered sequins is an absolute beauty

620078-29-aout-1953-robe-de-soiree-imprime-637x0-3and we can admire its modern version in John Galliano for Christian Dior 2008 Haute Couture Collection

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Though the leopard print has been despised by the bourgeoisie who found it vulgar and offensive, it continued to go strong decade after decade and survived any fashion trend imposing itself as a wardrobe staple.

Catherine Deneuve, Yves Saint Laurent absolute muse and perfect image of ice cold femininity, adopted leopard prints through out her life. Here in the 70’s wearing a leopard print trench coat, the mere essence of the “Rive Gauche”, both independent and teasing to be tamed by the right man.

images-1French-fashion-designer-Yves-Saint-Laurent-and-beautiful-actress-Catherine-Deneuve-4 Actress Deneuve kisses designer Yves Saint Laurent during the first France Fashion "Oscar" Gala in Parisimages

And is still able to teach Kate Moss some major fashion lesson throughout the lens of Patrick Demarchelier.image5

 

 

During his Fall Winter 1997-98 Couture Collection, Jean-Paul Gaultier sent down the catwalk a satin and leopard fur bustier gown which sent the PETA association through the roof. They were really close to throwing a pot of paint at the insulting garment. Thank got they didn’t.

defile-jean-paul-gaultier-automne-hiver-1997-1998_4064178 Alaïa, Dolce Gabbana, Roberto Cavalli , all three brands known for their voluptuous and sensual vision of women make a prodigal use of the famous print. Dolce and Gabbana being famous for lining their clothe with it.

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From accessories to make up, perfumes and even kids collections, the leopard print is everywhere.

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But do not forget that the first one to use it for a perfume ad was again Monsieur Christian Dior in 1949 for his  Miss Dior perfume illustration by Gruau in 1949, still so modern and feminine . And this powerful animal still leads the way for empowered yet feminine and seductive women all over the world. the only downside, you can never go cheap with leopard unless you have style and you know it.

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Bring back our girls

Last April 14th, so a month ago, 200 girls were abducted from their school in the Northeastern village of Chibok by terrorists. The rapt has been claimed by Abubakar Shekau, the leader of the Nigerian militant Islamist group Boko Haram who released a video calling for a release of Boko Haram militants in Nigerian jails in exchange for some of the  girls that they hadn’t converted to Islam yet.

Honestly, this is utterly shocking and I am ashamed to see that it took several weeks to get this publicly and internationally talked about. When a plane tragically crash into the sea, international medias are on a 24-7 coverage and governments spend fortunes trying to locate the vessel which is absolutely normal. Victims family should know where and how they loved ones disappeared and if they are still out there. But when it comes to school girls in a remote and unknown village in some African country (Nigeria? Liberia? whatever…) nobody moves for weeks. The first one to make a move and who came with this poster than is now viral is the FLOTUS, aka Michelle Obama.

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And I am very glad she did because just 4 days ago the #bringbackourgirls campaign went viral in every social media. Malala chimed in, another victime of pure violence and obscurantism,

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followed by Ellen DeGeneres,

ImagePuff Daddy who couldn’t help adding his own touch to it.

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The fashion industry followed suit with Cara Delevingne and it girl Alexa Chung which made a lipstick version of it (hey, anything goes, really)

ImageImageDo you think it is normal for school girls to be abducted on the school ground while they were taking some physics test ? What kind of threat did these school girls represent? Who are these armed terrorists claiming their allegiance to Islam?  What is this Islam these people state to belong to? It is outrageous to see in 2014 such a demonstration of violence and ignorance. Milleniums of history have brought no wisdom nor knowledge to some human beings, if we can still call them human.  They cover their crimes behind a distorted view of a religion they call their own but which is only a disguise for violence and terrorism. The view of these zombie like girls chanting words which were imposed upon them and bore absolutely no meaning for them was absolutely heart breaking. Is that what these Abo Bakar people were trying to do? Eradicate any knowledge and transforme women into a lobotomised army of ghosts?

My mother is catholic and my dad is muslim both of them non religious. I do not have a religion. I do believe in a greater creative force but not in religion. My friends are catholic, muslim, jewish, buddhist, religious, non religious… As a friend of mine use to say, you are what you were born to. I do respect people’s faith and believes as long as they respect mine.

But claiming that Islam is against girls been educated as we see in this case or in Afghanistan is absolute ignorance and completely outrageous.  Why have women and girls have represented a threat in many societies, whatever religion they were, all over the centuries? Is it because we have the power to give life that some dangerous fanatics think we shouldn’t be educated and hence transmit a knowledge?Why are women of all religious kept under a thick cloth by some fanatics of all religion? Is that a symbol of the veil of ignorance that we are trying to cast upon them?

Anyways, I think these poor girls had absolutely nothing to do with any political cause whatsoever and that the criminals who did that had absolutely no right to drag them into this. School girls in exchange of soldiers whose had are probably maculated in blood? These people have no moral nor faith despite of what they claim. Which god would ever ask for such a trade?

And what if it were your girls that had been abducted in their class room and taken in some remote and unknown place for some obscure cause????? Nobody talks about it in Mexico, this is why the boys and I came up with our own #bringbackourgirls campaign. And for those who may wonder why is our dog in the picture well, one the worst insult in islamic countries is to name someone a dog. Our dog is a female, aka bitch, so you get the picture.

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How to wear boyfriend jeans?

Boyfriends, lovers, husbands, fathers of our children…They all hate our boyfriend jeans while we absolutely love them for their comfort and easy look. So how to style them so they finally get to like them?

First of all, avoid wearing bulky sweaters or jackets with boy friends jeans. As they are slouchy, you have to have a tight bust to balance the look. No boots nor sneakers either as you have to show your ankles. They will seam a lot thinner with rolled up pant cuffs. The whole idea is to make everything other than the jeans look slimmer. So here’s how you can style them.

Photos by Luciana Michallat

With preppy accessories like here, I am wearing my J.Crew boyfriends, paired up with a striped Pull and Bear tee shirt, a Zara navy blazer, some Chanel classic pumps and a Mochila bag to add a little bit of funkiness.

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You can also wear it with a silk blouse, a little cleavage is better. Zara blouse, my J.Crew boyfriends jeans, Gucci belt, Louboutin sandals and lace printed leather purse made by me.

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Same J.Crew boyfriend jeans paired with a Maje tee shirt and biker jacket, Prada heels and sliver leather clutch also made by me.

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Or a more casual version with ballerina flats, here my Repetto bolt bolchoï ones paired with a poppy red silk Maje blouse and my Mochila bag.

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And you, how do you wear your boy friends?

Met Ball 2014 best looks, who improved from last year and who should fire her stylist?

The Met Ball 2014 is over and we had plenty of time to analyse every guest’s gown by now. So, after giving it a lot of thought, here are my winners for this year’s edition. So here was the dress code

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BEST DRESSED, I really hesitated between Sarah Jessica Parker in Oscar de la Renta Sarah-Jessica-Parker-1

and Suki Waterhouse in Burberry. I finally will go with Suki as SJP won last year and Oscar de la Renta was an the go to choice for this kind of dress code. Also, I’d rather wear my clothes tags inside than on the dress.

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Some ladies who were smack in the theme and flashed gorgeous gowns were

Karolina Kurkova looking like royalty in her gorgeous Marchesa gown,karolina-kurkova-vogue-6may14-pa_b

Amy Adams in Oscar de la Renta Autumn Winter 2014,amy-adams-vogue-6may14-pa_b Taylor Swift in a custom made Oscar de la Renta gown,taylor-swift-vogue-6may14-pa_b Bee Shaeffer in Alexander Mc Queenbee-shaeffer-vogue-6may14-pa_b

Charlize Theron in Christian Dior

charlize-theron-vogue-6may14-pa_b-1Jourdan Dunn and Toni Garn because they dared to wear TOPSHOP at the MET BALL and looked fabulousjourdan-dunn-toni-garrn-vogue-6may14-getty_b

Kendal Jenner in another bespoke TOPSHOP gorgeous gownkendall-jenner-vogue-6may14-pa_b

and Chanel iman in again TOPSHOPchanel-iman-vogue-6may14-getty_b-1

WORST DRESSED, again, balancing between Lupita N’yongo in what looked like a bird in cage Prada costumelupita-nyongo-vogue-6may14-pa_b

Christen Dunst in a star wars dress by Rodarte. The death star, really?????kirsten-dunst-vogue-6may14-pa_b

and Shailene Woodley with her Rodarte autumn/winter 2014 collection recycled rags but I think we really do have a winner here.shailene-woodley-vogue-6may14-pa_b

BEAUTIFULL OUTFITS BUT MISSED THE POINT

Blake Lively in a custom made Gucci Premiere gown

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Caea Delevingne and Stella MAc Cartney in Stella Mc Cartney. BTW, Miss Mc Cartney shouldn’t wear her hair in such a tight bun, it makes her looks old and ghostly

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Gisele was gorgeous as always in Balenciaga but really missed the point

gisele-vogue-6may14-pa_bWell between all the beautiful dresses that we saw on the catwalks, the vintage dealers and the couture houses museums, some guests should definitely fire their stylists. This is what I would have worn should I had been invite. A beautiful Vintage Dior Haute Couturec01b

The MET Ball 2014

A year ago, the Metropolitan Museum hosted the so anticipated VOGUE Met Ball, celebrating “Punk, from chaos to couture”. We would have thought that guest would turn up in their best black, piercings and safety pins attire but I was extremely disappointed. Exceptfor Sarah Jessica Parker who showed up in a magnificent Gilles Deacon ballgown paired with the most incredible Philip Treacey mohauk and plaid Christian Louboutin knee high boots Image and Cara Delevingne who mastered the Punk essence and managed to make it look super chic in a studded Burberry black gownImagethe  rest of the guests chose pretty over punk. The most ridiculous of them being the hostess herself, Mrs Anna Wintour showing up in a flowery Chanel dress saying that PINK was the true colour of punk????? Come on Anna, really????? Unknown Or may be the super pre go Kim Kardashian who pulled numerous strings to finally get the precious invite and walked the red carpet into what looked like your grandma’s old couch fabric. Sorry Ricardo Tischi but it was neither flattering , nor Punk. kim_kardashian_kanye_west_met_gala_2013_costume_institute_met_ball_punk_chaos_to_couture_red_carpet_celebrity_photos_18ogiov-18ogirm   So what did the guest wore this year for the MET 2014 Gala honouring designer Charles James. Um sorry, who?????????? We’ll forgive you if you haven’t heard of him, but he is a hugely influential New York designer who created elegant ball gowns in the 40s and 50s. James was close friends with Cecil Beaton, was highly respected by the likes of Christian Dior and was often dubbed ‘a great friend of the French couture.’ Here’s some of his work main-met-ball And that’s a giant flower sculpture inspired by Charles James designs.MetBallFloralDisplay_2014_5 The big bummer about this year’s edition  is that there will be no live coverage. we will have to wait for newspapers and bloggers to post online pictures of the event. So here are the pics I have gathered so far. We know that Michelle Obama got to cut the exhibition ribbon, next to Anna Wintour this morning wearing a Naeem Khan green and white frock. michelle-obama-anna-wintour-costume-center-ribbon-cutting-w724 Here is the invitation we were all dying to get in our mail box. Unknown SJP is wearing an Oscar de la Renta in the perfect Charles James’ tradition. And because she was just so tired of saying she wearing ODLR over and over, she had it written on the tail of her gown.Sarah-Jessica-Parker-1 Anna Wintour is wearing a rather unflattering arlequin dress with really ugly unlatching shoes CS61329582Mandatory-CreditKrissy Teigen has exposed a little too much of her anatomy, exposing herself to nasty comments from my favorite Fashion Police host, I can already here Joan Rivers comments.Chrissy-TeigenFlawless gown and styling for Suki WaterhouseSuki-Waterhouse Same for absolutely unknown to me Alicia Quarles, but she’s got taste and an excellent stylist.

Alicia-QuarlesKim Kardashian, recent Vogue covergirl, will obviously be there.  Let’s hope she’ll get a better stylist this time.

Follow Vogue on Instagram to get the full coverage but next year, Mrs Wintour, grant us plebeians a full live coverage please.